It HURTS a lot. It HURTS like hell sometimes I think I can't take it anymore but days come and go and I bare it everyday. It's just like a chronic wound very old that I'm not even sure if I want to heal, maybe I'm just use it to the pain to the sadness to depression, maybe I just lost the ability to be happy. At the end of the day it just HURTS like nothing else, nothing like a physical pain. When you're hurt physically but have a strong spirit you can encounter all the problems but a wound in your soul leaves you paralyzed, unable to move to change to fix the problem but it still HURTS.
I wish somebody come to me and rescue me, just like my other thoughts it's another wishful thought. I waited for my saviour for so many years that now I'm just drowned and lost the ability of rescuing myself. It still HURTS